Still carrying the #faithofachild

I have always known, since before I understood the extent of my illness, that God would use me, that He would heal me in a way that could only be a miracle, and He would use me to be a voice for those who are sick and frustrated by no or wrong diagnoses or diagnoses with no hope. Here is an interesting fact, I once learned at a Proverbs 31 day that since there are 31 verses in Proverbs 31 that you can go to the verse of the day of your birth and that verse would have a strong significance in your life. Noah was a baby at the time and I did not understand why Proverbs 31:8 would have anything to do with me.
  

Proverbs 31:8New King James Version (NKJV)

8 Open your mouth for the speechless,
In the cause of all who are appointed to die.

You can see now the significance because I feel with all my heart that this is what God called me to do, years before I knew true illness, years before I knew the struggle of fighting for my life would include fighting tooth and nail for the care I needed. Before I knew there are countless people dying because they just don't know how to get the care they need. I have met many amazing people who lost their lives to the battle I face and through the years God has sustained me, not because I deserve any more than any other one person but because He has a purpose for me. Little did I know when I was selling my own cookie line, Heaven's To Betsy's Gourmet Cookies that the verse I put on every cookie or tub of cookie dough I sold would have such significance for my personal walk.

Matthew 4:4New King James Version (NKJV)

4 But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.’”

For so long before I was able to get IV nutrition, I could not hold down any food or drink and God sustained me. Now that I am on IV nutrition God is still sustaining me. Little did I know when I chose that verse that I would not live by bread of any kind, food or drink, and He still is with me, always! He is this for you too, anyone who needs Him, call out to Him and He will guide you, heal you, sustain you, bless you, save you! 

One smart cookie

I gotta say I have been one smart cookie. I say that with total sarcasm. My man and baby have the flu so I am on Tamiflu but I failed to get my pain meds because they are on back order and I failed to call around to find it because I felt so bad. I know exactly the reason I should have. Then I realize I have one bottle of Zofran and 3 doses of Phenergan. This is going to be one heck of a weekend and I really hope I don't have to go to the ER. Could use the prayer and better sense. 

Snow day

The weather has been crazy here in Louisiana freezing rain and sleet to huge snowflakes but by Sunday it is supposed to be 70 and raining. Clint and Elijah are so sick with bronchitis, Hope is going to the dr tomorrow because of hip pain. 

I seem to be in a holding pattern with constant nausea and Migraine and I still throw up every single day. I try not to talk too much about how I feel because truly no one wants to hear all about it. When friends or family members get so sick with a stomach virus that they can't even think straight I am tempted to say I know just how they feel 24/7 but I do not because again, who really wants to hear that? I have learned to mask my pain and nausea to an extent but that doesn't mean it's not there. People tell me I look great or I don't look sick and I have no idea what to say to them. I can not wait until the day when God heals me and until then I will keep my head up and wait for The Lord. 

I long to be a voice for all those who are sick and the doctors either don't believe them or simply cannot properly diagnose them. It is so hard when you are fighting for your life and you have to fight for every ounce of care. I have been there and it is exhausting but if I didn't fight I would not still be here and I have known many sweet souls who didn't have the strength to fight for the care they needed and lost their lives from inadequate care. My heart breaks for those who are truly sick and ignored by doctors or put in a mental institution because of inadequacy. I pray for all the people who are sick and have trouble getting a diagnosis, and all the physicians out there to find the diagnosis and the med students to be trained to look harder to find the root of the problem.