Kim

     I know Kim doesn't want me to place this post and that is exactly why I am posting it. Clint's oldest sister Kim had really been a rock for me the past difficult months. If she sees my house needs to be cleaned she just does it, no point in arguing with her because she is just going to tell me I need to save my energy to enjoy my family. I have been so sick for so long that I cannot remember what it is like to be well. If I am resting, she will come keep Elijah company until I can get up to teach him or until Hope comes home. Clint, Noah, Krystian, Hope and Elijah are my family but we are so tight knit they are my best friends and I have to put Kim in that intercircle of best friends. I know people have issues with her and it's not up to me to say how she is with anyone else. But she is my friend, my confidante, and probably my biggest advocate as far as letting people know what I have and she sees day in and day out how I am feeling and it just makes her heart smile to know when I am having a good day.
     All of the sudden as in yesterday there is not an inch of my body that does not hurt, inside or out. I have no idea what's going on with me but my sweet Clint is trying to get me to sleep as much as I can but everytime I wake up, it feels like I have been thrown off a building time and again,. From my relentless migraine to what feels like bleeding and bruised organs to my skin feeling like fire ants are crawling under my skin. I am taking my nausea and pain meds around the clock and it just feels like I am throwing dust in the wind. Even Kim's Christmas cards contained information about my rare disease. Autonomic Autoimmune Neuropathy or AAN causing my gastroparesis, my gallbladder to stop working, and even when I was a child causing my appendix to have recurring appendicitis until I was 12 and had to have an emergency appendectomy. That is what this wretched disease does, causing my organs to quit one by one, the newest being my small intestines. I still know with all my heart God is going to heal me in His time and His way and I know he is going to use me as a voice for the voiceless, as an advocate for these health issues doctors either overlook, or don't want to deal with. I want to empower the patients, but I also want to set up a program that trains doctors in the  treatment and signs of these rare diseases. I can only hope, you, all my friends, family and aquantices will help spread the news. That young girl that didn't have any body shame but now can't stop herself from throwing up, don't automatically assume it is an eating disorder have a gastric emptying test and if that shows up normal then and only then should you treat it as an eating disorder. Young people don't know why their body does what it does and they need their parents to first see if it is a medical issue or an eating disorder. Eating disorders are very real and can be very harmful, even sometimes leading to gastroparesis but please rule that condition out first.
     I cannot type anymore because my hands even hurt so bad. Please pray this is something my body can get over.